This is my 300th post!

I take politics pretty seriously in that I think what happens in Washington and in our state capitals matters.  I care enough that decisions can upset me or make me angry.

But, seriousness aside, what keeps me tuning into the news and checking CNN.com constantly is something less noble than civic duty.  I keep up with politics because it’s fun.  It’s like keeping up with celeb gossip, but a little more high brow (in perception anyway).  I just find it all so engaging.

From debates to policy talk to scandals, I look forward every day to hearing the commentary of my favorite pundits.  I know she did it exactly for this reason, but it really killed me when Governor Palin announced her resignation right before a holiday weekend so that I couldn’t hear what my favorite political commentators had to say about it for days.

I like following a story as it unravels.  I love the strategy involved.  It’s interesting to see how things get twisted.  I’m constantly asking myself the question, “is that person a complete idiot or a political genius?”  There’s just so much news every day.

I could never be a politician myself.  I don’t have thick skin.  I’m not charismatic.  And, I have no patience for playing games.  I’d probably go in thinking I could really be a different kind of politician and then I’d leave a month later in tears and without any of my former idealism.  But, I would like to participate more in politics.  You know, flex those activist muscles.  Or maybe just the writing muscles.

It’s true that there was very little chance of me ever being a conservative.   I grew up on the liberal side of a liberal state.  I went to a liberal arts college where I didn’t study Business or Nursing, but English and Religion.  But, mostly, it’s just in my bones.  No one convinced me to be a liberal.  I just am one.

That’s not to say I grew up surrounded by liberals.  I come from a family of apathetics and moderates, the only exception is my dad who is fiscally very conservative and socially very liberal.  My dad used to be a Republican.  His views haven’t changed much, but he’s no longer a Republican, if that’s any evidence for how the party has changed.  I also had an AP Civics teacher who almost convinced me I was really a moderate with his arguments for small government.

What I’m saying is that I’m not a liberal because I don’t know anything else.  And, I’m not a liberal because I’ve ignored the strongest arguments of conservatives.    I listen to most of what present day Republicans have to say and I get almost nothing out of it.  It’s not smart.  It’s not genuine.  And, it’s not useful critique.  But, I have been strongly influenced by more traditional conservative principles and they have remained strong influences even as I have come into my own as a liberal.  That’s why I believe so strongly that we need at least two strong parties and not whatever it is we have now.

I don’t need to say again how over the moon I was when we elected Barack Obama.  Out of all the possibilities open to us, we got the best one on November 4th.  But, as I said in one of my first political posts, I wasn’t immediately drawn to Obama, because, prepare yourselves, he was not liberal enough for me.  For all the talk from the right about him being radical and the most liberal Senator, I didn’t see it.  He’s a moderate.   And when he was elected, I thought that’s what we needed.

But over the last few months, I have grown increasingly frustrated with Obama and especially with the Democratic party in general.  For a while I believed all the talk about bi-partisanship, even if I didn’t agree with it.  I don’t mean that they promised bi-partisanship and then didn’t deliver–I mean that they used bi-partisanship as a reason not to upset the corporations that fund them by really being progressive.

It would be one thing if I was out here on my own holding up the left wall, but I’m not!  We voted for a Democratic president whose views I hope most of us were familiar with before we voted.  And, we put that Democratic Congress in place too.  The polls coming back on health care show that Americans want a public option while the Democrats in Congress keep saying it’s not likely.  But, it’s a lie.  They can make it happen and they are choosing not to, because they are so heavily influenced by the insurance industry.  I don’t expect Republicans to suddenly change their opinion on this, but Democrats should know better and they have the power.  I want them to stop pretending they couldn’t make this happen if its what they wanted.

Just to be clear, because I guess I should prepare myself for Democrats who want to disown me and Republicans who want to try the impossible task of putting a unique spin on Obama’s Change motto, I am not sorry we elected Obama and I think he’s performing brilliantly on a lot of things, foreign relations especially.  I cut Obama and the Democrats in congress a lot of slack (too much) for a long time, because I said to myself that I’m a political realist and playing political games and appeasing interest groups is part of the deal.  But, I’ve changed my mind.  Now, I not only think it’s wrong for our country.  I don’t even think it’s smart politically.  On the issue of health care alone, Democrats are missing the boat and that might still leave them the lesser of two evils with the public, but it’s not going to keep them in high favor.  I think the public will forgive them in the short-term for not doing what they should on the torture issue, but they will not forigive Democrats for a prolonged economic crisis or if they mess up health care again.

I have sometimes made a point of calling myself a crazy liberal, because I know I sound radical.  But, I don’t want to apoligize for being a liberal anymore, because I’m not sorry.  If I sound radical, well, okay.  But I am not unreasonable and I don’t believe what I do by ignoring all opposition and I pay my taxes and I support capitalism and I don’t think it’s too idealistic to know that you live in one of the best countries in the world and to want it to be even better.

My first response when the California Supreme Court upheld Prop 8 was, well, not surprise.  No one thought they would overturn it and they didn’t.

Election Day 2008 was bittersweet.  When it became clear that Barack Obama was going to win, I was out of this world excited, but my attention immediately turned to Prop 8.  Whether I voted for Obama in Washington or California, it wouldn’t have mattered, but I was so happy to have become a California resident the summer previous so that I could vote no on Prop 8.

When the numbers started coming in, I still held out hope.  Up to election day, the projections had always been very close, but that’s not the way the numbers were coming in.  Against reason, I continued to hold out hope, but I was only disappointed.  And then I had to face the people in my own community who were far more affected by this decision than me.  Many of them are gays and lesbians studying to become ordained, which I mention in case you’re prone to simplistic views of religious people, especially Christians.  It wasn’t just the possibility of marriage that was taken away, but the declaration that you are not equal to us.  It broke my heart.

Since November 4th, I have been positively shocked by the domino effect of states across the country legalizing gay marriage.  I know that they will face the same challenges as California, but it’s a movement now and that makes a difference.

My response to the Supreme Court upholding Prop was, as I said before, not shock.  It was calm.  Because I have the confidence that California will get this right very soon.  And, I know that’s not adequate.  The last thing I want to say to the gay and lesbian community is don’t worry, we’ll get it right eventually. That is simply not enough.

When I was in college, I worked as a receptionist with this girl who was my opposite in almost every way, but who was my friend anyway.  We were a true odd couple.  We often got into debates.  I remember one very clearly.  It was before gay marriage even seemed like a possibility, but we were still debating the rights of gay people.  Her opinion was that the gay community should stop making such a fuss, because things would work out eventually.  She always seemed to think that things happened magically over time, which drove me nuts, because I know that things do not just happen over time–they happen when people fight like hell over time.

So much of the talk about gay marriage has frustrated me, especially since the former Miss California’s strange speech on “opposite marriage.”  There’s so much talk about respecting the opinion of people who think gay marriage is wrong.  I think it’s bullshit.

I will respect the opinion of someone who thinks that gay marriage is wrong and for that reason chooses not to marry someone of the same sex.  I will not respect the opinion of someone who thinks that gay marriage is wrong and therefore votes to make gay marriage illegal for everyone in their state.  There’s nothing respectful about taking rights away from your fellow citizens.  I’m not going to tolerate injustice.  I’m not going to dance around the issue that I not only think they’re wrong, but that I think they’re bigots.

Yes, I think we will all look back at this moment and compare the supporters of Prop 8 to those who denied rights to black people and women and other minority groups.  But, I’m not going to waste my time placating those people.  If they want to listen to me or even if they want to really challenge me, I will listen.  I’m not scared of differing opinions.  But, if they’re going to stand in the way of the rights of homosexuals, I’m not going to give them respect.  They will always be free to their prejudices and I won’t act against them in violence.  The first amendment prevents the government from taking away their right to free speech, but it doesn’t prevent me from disagreeing with them.  It’s not against the law to be a racist or sexist in this country either, but  I don’t respect those people either.

It’s not enough that we’re getting there, but we are.  California will get this right.  Very soon, I think.  We underestimated the hate and prejudice we were up against.  In the meantime, I will support the gay and lesbian community as they lead the fight.

I haven’t written about politics much since the election.  Mostly I’ve just been sitting back and watching, trying to sort everything out.  Here are some things I’ve been thinking.

• It’s pretty obvious that no one has the answer for getting out of this economic crisis.  There are stupid people trying to make everything seem simpler and easier than it is, who say things like, “we just have to create jobs” like saying it out loud will do the trick.  There are smart people who realize that this situation is different than others that have passed before, but are nevertheless trying to marry together what we’ve learned from history with new ways of thinking.  But, no one knows what will do it, and I know that uncertainty is really uncomfortable, especially when it’s felt together by huge masses of people, but I don’t see a way other than trial and error.

• I’ve been thinking a lot about what it feels like to be a member of the party out of power.  I hear Republicans–the loud ones talking on tv–say they feel like their country is being taken away from them and that it’s taboo to even disagree with Obama.  Honestly, my first reaction to this is, “Are you kidding me?  Are you so short sighted that you don’t see that the rest of us have been feeling this for the last eight years?”  But, then I thought about the Republicans who dealt with eight years of Clinton, and I wonder if it always feels like this.  I’m too young to have that perspective, but maybe our memories are always this short.  Maybe it always hurts, no matter the history.

• I’ve also been thinking a lot about bipartisanship.  The events of the last month have certainly changed my mind about a few things.  I’m still not sure what it means for legislation to be bipartisan or for Obama to make attempts at bipartisanship.  But, in this case, I don’t think it means that Republicans get equal say in everything.  I mean, it’s no coincidence that we have a Democrat for President or liberal majorities in the House and Senate.  We voted that way–not just me, but a majority of the country.  So, yeah, I want Republican input, but I don’t want legislation that matches Republican ideals, because I don’t agree with them.  And, yeah, I know we’re all hypocritical and I don’t expect anything less, but in this case I will say that Obama has already made more of an effort than Bush ever did.

• I’m somewhat uncomfortable with the It’s an Emergency!!!! emphasis we’ve put on passing legislation.  I find myself thinking, “well, it is an emergency,” but how much crap did Bush get through because it was an emergency!!!!!  I wish we didn’t operate this way.

• I’m liberal.  I’m a Democrat.  Obviously I have that bias, and I want to see those ideals acted out.  But, I really wish we had a formidable offense.  If capitalism teaches us anything, it’s that the best ideas–innovation!–result from real competition.  Democrats need Republicans to challenge them.   Instead they’re throwing rocks at our feet, calling us names that don’t make sense, and arguing on the basis of bad information.  This isn’t good for anyone, especially at a time when we need good ideas more than ever.  If there had been a strong Democratic party when the Republicans were in power, then I don’t things would be as bad as they currently are.

• All of that leads me to this question, which I hope isn’t offensive, because it is a real question.  “Where are the smart Republicans?”  All of the ones I used to know are now Democrats, even if they remain fiscally conservative.  The ones on TV, at least the loud ones, certainly don’t have it together.  I don’t just mean that they’re bankrupts of ideas.  But, they really don’t even come across as smart people.  I don’t want to argue against the straw man.  But, I don’t see anyone formidable.  Someone give me some hope and point me towards the smart ones.  I don’t need to agree with them.  I just want to see that they’re grounded in some level of honest assessment and logic.

I had a nice post all planned out, but it always happens that I scrap the scheduled posts for the spur of the moment posts.

• I had a major Adorable Boy fail tonight. Actually, it wasn’t major. It was very minor, and that’s why it was disappointing. Lisa bet me $50 to invite him to her Valentine’s Day party, but that wasn’t happening unless I yelled after him in a quiet library. He should be back soon, though, and I’ll work my magic then. Yeah, that’s what will happen. I wish I wasn’t so damn ridiculous, but every time I think I’ve done something too pathetic to even post about, I end up posting about it anyway.

• Maybe I’m not remembering election night properly, but it seemed like things set in after the big win. I watched the inauguration (which aired quite early on the west coast, by the way) but it still doesn’t feel real. I keep reminding myself that there is no more waiting. I have my new president. Maybe it doesn’t feel real yet, but I sure feel joyous when I stop and remember.

• The new first family is adorable. It’s weird. I love them to pieces, but I actually feel kind of sorry for them too. Even though there’s so many amazing aspects to it, that is not a life I’d want for myself.

• I did not understand or enjoy the inauguration poem, yet complaining about it seems wrong somehow. I mean, hating on poetry–not the inauguration.

• I try not to talk about work, because I wouldn’t want my job to be compromised if this not-so-anonymous blog was found. But, let me just tell you about one of my coworkers. Lisa and I call her KIA (pronounced like the car). That stands for Know It All. I won’t say any more. You can guess how annoying that is.

• Speaking of work, I’m finally back to my normal schedule of working swing shift. It’s really not a good shift, but I missed it.

• After my awesome weekend of eating and drinking and playing cards with Elyse, I’m left with a house full of bad-for-me foods. I threw some of it away, because I cannot be in a house with Oreos. The giant bottle of vodka I obviously have to finish off, but the Oreos had to go.

I’ve been thinking about this post for a long time.  I was going to call it something like “The Honeymoon’s Over,” by which I meant that the way I feel about Barack Obama has changed from infatuation and unconditional confidence to something a little more reasonable.  Like, okay, maybe he’s not the second coming, but he’s still pretty awesome.

Those of you who were reading my blog in October and November know that I could hardly force myself to talk about anything but the election.  From the first debate until the evening of November 4th, I was a nervous wreck.  After the devastation of 2004, I couldn’t believe things were actually going to work out.  But when they did, I was elated.  I was a happy fool.

It took a while for my feet to touch the ground again.  But they did, and I’ve been lost ever since.  Here’s the thing.  I don’t know how to feel, because I don’t know what it’s like to have a president I can respect.  Somehow I thought the feelings would come naturally, but I’m struggling to find some balance between my extreme hate for the outgoing Bush administration and my extreme optimism for the incoming Obama administration.

Eight years is a long time, but the last eight years have been the most dynamic of my life.  Eight years ago, I was newly seventeen.  Since then, I’ve graduated from high school, stopped pretending to be a moderate, felt the crushing disappointment of being on the losing side of a presidential election, graduated from college, decided what I wanted to do with my life, moved away from home, and started graduate school.

I used my disgust for the Bush administration as an excuse to be largely apathetic, and I don’t know now what it means to be an adult citizen participating fully in a democratic system.  I’ve hidden myself in the ivory tower of the academy, talking about ideals, but doing nothing.  I always knew that wasn’t enough, but quite at odds with my idealism, I had very little hope.

For now, I’m going to celebrate!  Wednesday, I’m going to continue the awkward process of figuring out what it means to be a participatory citizen with a president I respect.

1. I like Sarah Palin’s accent and her folksy way of talking. I don’t understand why she says “too” and “also” so much, but I still love to hear it. Though, I must admit it’s a little less endearing when she’s saying ridiculous things about associations and socialism.

2. I have a major crush on Brian Williams. This is nothing new, but I saw a lot more of him on election night than I had in a while. He’s just so smart and handsome and funny. Watching this SNL clip if you don’t believe he’s funny.

3. Because I feel sorry for everyone always, the minute I saw John McCain standing there conceding with a teary-eyed Palin next to him, I was almost ready to forgive them for the disgusting campaign they led.

4. I see these McCain-Palin supporters on my TV screen looking devastated, saying that things will never be the same and this is a dark day for America, and I just want to scream at them that a) that’s exactly what it’s been like for the rest of us to live in this country for the last eight years, and b) it’s not that bad, life goes on as always.

5. College-educated people voted for Obama. That means something, but I don’t know what I can say that doesn’t sound snobbish. Maybe it’s just what Chris Matthews says: educated people are more confident that they can adjust to change, because they have more opportunities for work and such. Or, maybe it’s more.

6. I keep thinking I’m writing too much about politics, and soon one of you will tell me to just shut up already. Then I remember that you all have a history of being ridiculously nice to me, and you have the option of not reading.

7. I don’t want to know that anyone in my family voted for McCain, even though they all live in overwhelmingly blue states, and, oh yeah, Obama won already.

8. I’m jealous of young Democrats who voted in this election as their first. I’m sure being on the losing side of the vote in 2004 has given me some extra appreciation or made me stronger or something, but I could have done without that devastation.

9. I felt ill all day on Tuesday. My stomach was in knots, I could barely eat, and my neck was all tense. I’m not usually so dramatic.

10. I’d like to go around California kicking everyone who voted yes on Prop 8. It’s one thing to lose an election and miss out on the things that could have been possible under your candidate, but it is something else to have your rights taken away. Once I kick these people and they’re on the ground, I’ll tell them just how much they hurt people in my community that I care about. I hope they try some biblical literalism on me; if I’ve gained nothing else from my expensive education, I’ve at least learned every argument to strike that down.

11. I really don’t understand this message: “It doesn’t matter who you vote for–just vote! Vote. Vote! VOTE!!!!” I find it obnoxious and patronizing. Of course it matters who you vote for. I support get out the vote efforts, and I think they’re responsible for Obama’s win, but I’m not going to scream at people to vote or guilt them into it. I’m not going to make the act of voting more important than the choice of who to vote for. Maybe this one’s unfair, but I was annoyed with some of my acquaintances who I thought were self-righteously preaching VOTE!!!!!!! to people who were already going to vote. And, I might lose it if I ever hear someone try to pass off “If you don’t vote, then you can’t complain” as some kind of original, insightful statement. As far as I can tell, complaining is a fundamental right not dependent on voting.

12. I’m 100% serious and genuine about liking Palin’s accent.

I am incredibly happy.

I was stuck at work all night, but I was still watching the moment MSNBC (specifically my bff Keith Olbermann) called it. Seeing images of Americans celebrating all over the country, I was filled with this warm and fuzzy feeling of being at home; it was the opposite of the alienation I felt after Bush’s 2004 victory. I watched McCain concede, and I cried a little; he waited until the last possible moment to show some decency, but his words still stirred some emotion in me. When Obama gave his acceptance speech in Grant Park, I was huddled around my computer with some coworkers and a few library patrons.

Much like these historic events usually play out, it felt at once like nothing out of the ordinary and also like the biggest political moment of my lifetime. It feels big, the relief and excitement are almost overwhelming, but here I sit doing the things I always do. Time doesn’t stop; it just keeps going.

But, that’s part of what’s so exciting. We just keep moving, and now I can feel optimistic about the direction we’re headed. And, I am very optimistic–maybe even foolishly so. I just believe in the leader we’ve elected, and I am cheered by the support he has in this country. For once the pride I feel as an American isn’t tinged with this sense that being patriotic means ignoring my country’s faults.

This election is historic for many reasons. As it relates to racism, sexism, and what it means to be an American (a real one), this election has brought out the best and the worst in people. For me, this moment feels historic because positive transformation feels possible. I do believe we can come together. I do believe we can change life in America for the better. I do believe we can get ourselves on a more sustainable track. And, I do believe we can improve our image around the world. Change doesn’t feel like just a buzz word; it feels like a real possibility.

I intended for this post to be just a line or two about how happy I am. I guess I should have known I have too many words for that. To sum up: yay!

I was feeling really optimistic when I wrote this on Sunday. Now I’m one big ball of nerves. I could throw up at any minute. I know what the polls say, but I won’t believe it until it’s official. Happy Election Day!

There’s a feeling of helplessness when you’re playing a game, but you know you can’t ever win, because your opponent isn’t following the rules. You could sink to their level, you could abandon the rules too, and maybe you even do for a time, but you’re never willing to go as far as them. So, they win. Every time they win.

You’re not a vindictive person, but you can’t help but hope that one day they’ll feel the effects of their lies and deceit. The best possible scenario is not that they’ll be beaten at their own game, but that they’ll be defeated by an honest game. For once, the honest campaign won’t finish last.

I’ve tried not to let my political posts devolve into Obama the hero, and McCain the scum of the earth. But, it’s been hard. Any way I try to spin it, the basic result is no less than Obama the decent human being, and McCain-Palin the lowest of the low.

If you’ve been paying any attention to this election, you’ve noticed negative campaigning on both sides. You’ve undoubtedly also noticed that at this point, McCain and Palin rarely open their mouths except to spew hypocritical, anti-intellectual half-truths.

The crap they get away with is amazing. But, this year they’re not getting away with it because people are buying it; they’re getting away with it, because no one (save for maybe Keith Olbermann) has the energy to point out every contradiction. It’s a joke. What will they come up with next?

I feel incredibly sorry for the Republicans on the receiving end of this crap. I can’t imagine what it feels like to have your candidate think so little of you that he daily insults your intelligence by repeating claims that can’t even stand up to a dictionary (socialism), let alone recent history (who gave Professor Khalidi how much money?). He plays on your honor and patriotism, and then turns around and deceives you. After eight years of such treatment, Republicans deserve better. I know you thought McCain was different. Once, he was different. But, he’s not the same guy anymore.

Republicans have not won the last two elections because they have better policies. The greatest evidence of this is that now the only viable campaign message is to reject the policies of the Bush administration. Not much progress was made on those social issues either. Roe v. Wade stands, and there have been advances toward legalizing gay marriage. And, how many people of the socially conservative right who made those Republican wins possible benefited from the Bush tax cuts? This small government, fiscal conservative and his vice president have grabbed unprecedented power and exploded the deficit.

Your candidate is betting that you can’t think for yourself–can’t simply put two and two together to realize the contradictions. Prove him wrong. You don’t have to support Obama. You don’t agree with him on the issues. I can understand that. But, don’t believe the same lies again.

Let’s hope Lincoln was right: “It is true that you may fool all of the people some of the time; you can even fool some of the people all of the time; but you can’t fool all of the people all of the time.”

To win against a cheating opponent is something. To win by following the rules, by being decent, by standing behind your policies, well, that’s something else.

A win today would mean that decency sometimes wins out, even in politics, and that we know we deserve better. It would mean electing a president that we can put at least a small amount of trust in without fooling ourselves–a president who’s not threatened by criticism and free thinking constituents. But, maybe I’m a dreamer.

I’ve been talking a lot about politics lately. Over the last several months, I have subjected myself to the constant flood of news regarding this election. At this point, I can recite nearly all of the policy proposals of McCain and Obama, including their criticism of each others plans, and their responses to that criticism (well, Obama-Biden’s responses; McCain and Palin never have rebuttals). I am so full of information that when I talk to people about these things, I find myself overwhelming the conversation. I have to get it out. I have to talk! And, this blog has been my outlet.

But, don’t get the wrong idea. This isn’t normal for me.

I’m going to let you in on my own hypocrisy. I can’t stand to hear people say they’re just not that in to politics. To me, it’s not a choice. You are every day affected by politics, you are every day being represented by politicians, and you are every day responsible for the effects your government’s policies have on the world. Politics is not a hobby. Your silence is consent.

That said, I don’t know, I’m just not that in to politics. At least, I haven’t been for the last several years. I usually have at least a vague sense of what’s going on. I gather it from things I hear in class, and stories I pick up through popular media. I’m very ashamed of this, but apparently not enough to pick up a newspaper. I would never tell anyone I wasn’t in to politics, because I know how stupid that sounds. In some situations, I try to hide my ignorance, but for the most part, it’s pretty easy to skate through my life with only minimal knowledge of what’s going on in the world.

So, what’s responsible for my sudden interest in politics? It seems I was just dipping my toes in the pool, and I accidentally fell in. I’ll tell you what pushed me.

For the most part, I avoided the primaries. I was undecided between Clinton and Obama, and so I voted for Clinton knowing already that my state was going to Obama. By the convention, it was getting harder to avoid election fever, but I was still holding out. I knew I was going to vote for Obama, but I didn’t know much about his record, so I visited one of those sites that tells you where a candidate stands on the issues. I’ll tell you now, I wasn’t particularly impressed. For as much as the McCain campaign and other Republicans have tried to label Obama a radical among liberals, his voting record doesn’t say that to me. I am more liberal than Barack Obama, and I don’t consider myself a radical in the least.

It was a combination of things, the order of which I don’t remember. But, the most important thing–the push I needed–was finally listening to Obama speak. I’d heard all about his reputation as an eloquent speaker–the subtext being that he can make anything sound good no matter the content or lack of substance.

I’ve never heard that from Obama. I hate when people say a lot of things without ever saying anything. Obama doesn’t do that. There is a lot of substance to his speeches, even when his purpose is to motivate rather than convert. When I heard him speak, I was shocked to hear someone say things that felt true to me. I’d never heard such things from a politician who wasn’t on the fringes. This was a man running for president, I couldn’t believe the words coming out of his mouth. Or, rather, I could believe the words coming out of his mouth, and that made all the difference.

It would be easy, and I doubt anyone would object, but I’m not going to blame my political apathy on George Bush. My point here is only to explain myself. I said in a post several weeks ago that my response to Bush’s reelection in 2004 was first devastation, and eventually distance and apathy. I just couldn’t face the lies and contradictions of the administration, and I felt completely alienated from the rest of the country. Call it a defense mechanism or laziness; whatever it was, I retreated.

Cheesy as it may sound, I feel reawakened by the promise of Obama. If he doesn’t believe the things he’s saying, then he has me fooled. I am amazed by his intelligent assessment of the problems, the way he surrounds himself with smart people, his efforts to unite Americans rather than play the party game, the amazing organization of his campaign, and his smart solutions. I am excited by the prospect of having a competent president. I care, because I think that he cares. It’s comparable to the difference between working for a boss you detest and one you respect.

Listening to This American Life last week, I realized that my experience is nothing unique. They followed a student working out of the Obama campaign office in State College, PA, and her experience was much the same as my own. She was devastated by the Bush win in 2004, and she dealt with it by retreating into study and closing herself into the bubble of college life. At the time of the interview, she was working tirelessly registering students to vote.

That the Obama campaign has managed to get millions of people (many of them non-traditional voters) to care about politics again or for the first time is a major accomplishment. That they’ve managed to do this without using scare tactics is amazing.

In time we’ll see if the interest and motivation that Obama has stirred up has the power to last. Months from now will I still be living at CNN.com? Probably not. Will I still be checking it and others regularly? I think so.

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The Daily Show provides way more than laughs. But, you probably knew that already. On Monday, they did this piece where they interviewed people at Palin and Obama rallies. You should watch it if you haven’t already, but I’ll sum it up this way: McCain supporters are terrified of an Obama presidency; they think that America as they know it will cease to exist. Obama supporters are terrified of a McCain presidency; they don’t think this country can take another four years, and the very thought of a President Palin makes them want to cry.

Of course, I identify with the Obama supporters. To me, this is not just politics. We have to do something, and electing McCain would be the equivalent of doing nothing. It’s emotional. It’s serious. It’s scary.

But, how do I make sense of these fervent McCain supporters who feel the same urgency I do, but think so differently about the solutions we need? I think they’re wrong. Maybe that’s arrogant or pretentious, but we cannot all be right. So, that’s how I continue to support Obama in the face of opposition.

But, what do we do with a country that’s so polarized, especially in a time of such crisis? I don’t know. I really don’t. As others have characterized him, I think that Obama is a unifying figure. Unlike McCain-Palin, his message is not divisive, and it’s not about fear. Still, there are people who won’t come around. I hear them repeat those tired and untrue claims about Obama the Muslim terrorist socialist, and I think, “How can you believe that crap? Where is your reason?”

It always happens with The Daily Show. As soon as I stop laughing, I become a little more discouraged about the state of this great nation of ours (to borrow a line from Palin).

Or, proof that this election has gone on too long.

I have for you three examples of me responding with only the utmost maturity to people with political persuasions different than my own.  At the same time that I am still totally enthralled by this election, I am also so ready for it to be over.

1. As I was driving home from Panera, I came across a crowd of people on the street holding signs about Prop 8.  My heart was warm for a moment, but as I got closer, I discovered that the signs said “Parental Rights.”  That’s code word for Yes on Prop 8, or yes to banning gay marriage in California.  The commercials on repeat around here warn that if Prop 8 passes, then kids are going to start learning in schools that it’s okay for a boy to marry a boy (and parents won’t be able to stop them).  First, it’s clear from the commercial that I’m supposed to be outraged by this, but it doesn’t bother me at all.  Second, this is a lie.  Kids don’t learn about marriage in school.  They learn about marriage partly by what they see on TV and in movies, and mostly from what they witness at home. The teacher’s union has confirmed that kids will not be learning about marriage in school, and has even donated one million dollars to help fight against this proposition, which they view as a civil rights issue.

More than the proposition itself, I am disgusted by how its supporters have worked to gain support by scaring people with their propaganda.  I am enthused, though, by the number of church groups I’ve seen fighting against this proposition, because, even though they do not support gay marriage, they recognize this as a civil rights issue, and they are concerned about a precedent that would make it okay to take rights away from people.  They fought hard for their religious rights, and they don’t want those taken away like this proposition threatens to take away the marriage rights of gay people.

I responded to these people on the street with their “Prop 8: Parental Rights” signs like any intelligent person would: I sneered at them as I drove by.

2. There’s this undergrad who comes into the library all the time.  He’s demanding, he’s a know it all, and he was standing in my line the other day, rolling his eyes because the person in front of him was taking too long to gather her things and get out of his way.  When it was his turn a minute later, I asked for his ID card, and he had to search for it.  I wanted to suggest to him that getting his card ready might have been a better use of his time than rolling his eyes, but I didn’t say a word.  When he finally handed me his card, I went to swipe it, and as I was doing that I noticed the McCain-Palin sticker on the back.  I swear it wasn’t a conscious thought, but when I went to hand the card back to him I sorta accidentally threw it at him.  Whoops!

3. When I was walking through the parking lot at work the other day, I noticed a bright red car parked so terribly that it prevented anyone from taking the spot next to it, and made it almost impossible for me to back out.  As I neared, I saw the giant McCain-Palin stick on the bumper right next to the Yes on Prop 8 one.  Once in my car, I packed up right into this red car, and then took off.  Okay, I didn’t, but I wanted to.

I’m sorry.  I won’t defend these thoughts or behaviors, but in the last week I’ve lost the tiny bit of respect I had for McCain, Palin, and their high-profile supporters.  Whether they’re trying to divide Virginia into real and fake, claim that liberals hate America, root out the anti-American house and senate members, or repeat the tired claims about Ayers and socialism, I just can’t take it anymore.

Now that it seems the Republican party is turning on itself, I hope its next incarnation will be something I can respect.  What’s happened to all the fiscal conservative, social moderates?

As John McCain was giving his closing remarks at the debate tonight, I had a thought that filled me full of happiness. This was the thought process: McCain should not be trying to make this point about trust. He just doesn’t come across as genuine. I wouldn’t believe him anymore if he told me the sky was blue. >>> I can’t wait to hear Obama’s closing remarks; I just love to hear him speak. >>> I can’t even imagine having a president I respect. I’m too young to know what that’s like. >>> Wow. Obama could really be our president in just a few short months.

For weeks, I’ve been thinking that John McCain is going to lose. But, I’ve tried not to get my hopes up about what that would mean. I haven’t even let myself think of President Obama.

When we elected George W. Bush the first time, I was sixteen. I didn’t know anything about politics. The number one thing on my mind was getting my license. The second thing was probably *NSYNC. As a senior in high school, I took AP Civics, and my eyes were opened to politics for the first time. My conservative teacher tried to drag this bleeding heart right, but the best he could manage was left of center. When I got to college, I finally found my people. It’s a pretty awesome feeling when you’re surrounded for the first time by people who think like you do. I had a lot of hope.

Then we elected Bush for a second term. I was devastated. I’d never felt so alienated in my entire life. I just couldn’t understand. I took solace in the academic community, and eventually we moved on, but I’m not proud to say that I’ve made it through these last four years in politics mostly by closing my eyes and turning my head.

In class, we dream. We talk about peace. We talk about how people should relate to each other. We talk about how we exclude when we should accept. We talk about the very real chance we’ll destroy ourselves, but we hold out hope that we can change our behavior. We talk about the devastation of globalization, and how we can help those it’s left impoverished. We remain optimistic, because the only other option is to passively ride this ship as it sinks into the depths.

I am a dreamer in many senses of the word. But, I am not impractical. I refuse defeat, but I’ve grown far more pessimistic in just the last year alone. The more you learn, the more you discover how overwhelmingly complicated everything is. There are no simple solutions to any of these problems–not with our global economy, not with foreign affairs, not with health care, not with education, not with global warming.

I belong to a community of people, mostly academics and progressive Christians, who are fighting for things that I believe in with my whole person. But, we are a small group, and these are not the problems of small groups. They are global problems. They cannot be blamed on radicals or corrupt individuals. They are built into our systems, our institutions, our practices, our very modes of thought. We all participate in them, and so we are all responsible for them.

Systemic problems require systemic solutions. It’s what you’ve always heard about teaching a man to fish. And, that’s why simply hearing Obama and Biden–people in power–name the problems that we’ve named, and propose solutions that we can support, restores some of the hope I’ve lost. Even just to hear them give logical arguments, respond directly to criticism, and talk to me about the America I experience, sets them apart from the competition.

I don’t agree with Obama on everything; we disagree on capital punishment, gay marriage, and even economic issues. But, I’m not looking for a president to put up on a pedestal. I’m looking for a president who will make progress, or, at the very least, stop or slow down the cycle of decay. And, I think Obama is that president. I agree with what he says, and I believe what he says.

In 2004, when the majority of the voters in this country disagreed with me, I felt alienated. It’s pleasant to think that if the majority agrees with me this time, I will feel embraced. But, recent events at McCain-Palin rallies have made me realize that there are so many people in this country for whom this election seems life or death, and not all of them will be voting like me. I don’t want them to be devastated like I was devastated, and I’m not naive or arrogant enough to think they’ll eventually come around to my way of thinking.

But, I’ll worry about that later. Tonight I’m just soaring on the very real possibility that Barack Obama will be our next president. I’m giddy at the thought of being proud of my president and proud of not just what this country has done or it’s potential, but what it’s doing now.

I promised myself that I would stop writing about politics when I no longer had anything original to say. Who needs another person on any side just repeating the same old stuff? I’m dancing pretty close to that line now, but I really don’t care to proceed with caution. I’m completely engaged in this election, and I want to talk.

So, I guess John McCain and I have something in common. We’ll just keep talking, whether or not we have anything original to contribute. The difference between us is that I think I’m pretty willing and capable to adapt what I say to responses I get. Seems to be a McCain-Palin tactic to make a point, watch and smile (Palin) or look away and smirk (McCain) as your opponent refutes your claim, and then repeat the original point and statistics without in any way responding to your opponent’s counter argument. The final step is to hope voters are too dumb to notice what you’ve done. It’s annoying to me that the time constraints of the debates make it possible to get away with this.

It seems that even when your opponent preempts your ridiculous argument, you will still follow the formula. He’ll say: I want to go through line-by-line and cut all programs that aren’t working. John will say I’m proposing all kinds of new spending, but the net total is still less than our current budget. You’ll respond: Senator Obama has proposed 349587 kajillion dollars of new spending. What I want to do is go through every program and cut all the useless spending.

And, that brings me to another point. Last night only, and not in the previous debate, it seemed like John McCain often repeated what Obama had just said without saying (save for once!) that he agreed with Obama. Like with the last example. Sure, going through the budget and cutting unnecessary projects isn’t a genius idea in the first place, but McCain used such the same wording as Obama that it seemed strange he didn’t even acknowledge the similarity. It’s a joke they’ve used a few times on It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia, where one character comes up with a brilliant plan, the other says, “no, I know what we should do,” and then repeats the same plan as if he came up with it on his own. You see, it’ funny because it’s ridiculous; playing up this angle would have worked far better than McCain’s actual attempts at humor last night.

As for tired arguments:

Dearest Obama, I will give you “John McCain two weeks ago said the fundamentals of our economy were strong,” because that says a lot about what McCain knows about the economy, but give the “Bomb, Bomb Iran” thing a rest.

McCain, my friend (that’s your line, right?), don’t tell me again that Obama did not support the surge and still won’t admit it was a success. He has admitted it; he even said he was wrong. And, for your own good, stop with that thing about how Obama would sit down and talk to terrorists, because he has refuted your spin over and over again, and it was never a good argument to begin with. What fault am I to find in that? Also, don’t bring up the thing about small businesses being taxed unless you find a response to Obama-Biden’s counter that only a small percentage of small businesses make more that 250,000 a year.

Hearing Cindy McCain label the Obama campaign as the “dirtiest campaign in American history” just after her husband’s campaign announced their new swift-boat strategy, well, it made me wonder whether some of these people–Republican and Democrat–believe their own spin or just spew it. I’m serious. I myself have no BS-ing talent at all–not even the amount that would make life a little easier–so I don’t understand how it works.

Here are some other seemingly hypocritical things I don’t understand. Palin saying our economy needs strict government oversight (regulation?), but government should just get out of the way! McCain saying he’s going to put a stop to all government spending, but buy up a bunch of bad mortgages. McCain continuing to say he’s a reformer, though he’s voted over and over again with the president. This one’s a little unfair: McCain saying in the same sentence that he’s not very popular with his party (so, how’d you become the Republican candidate?) or the Democrats, and somehow that makes him good at bipartisan work; mavericks work really well with others, right? For good measure, I’ll throw in, Obama wanting to cut taxes for the middle class, but signing the bailout bill (though I understand why he thought it was necessary).

Back to Tuesday’s debate, am I the only one who’s uncomfortable with all the American is the best nation in the world, America has the greatest work force in the world, America is the greatest force of good in this world talk? Coming from either candidate, I don’t like it. I love America. But, I cannot swallow that arrogance. Why do we need to declare ourselves the best in the world? Oh yeah, so we’ll be motivated by fear to preserve our superiority. At least to the last example, I can agree. Speaking of nations, America does have the greatest potential for good. It also has the greatest potential for evil. That’s how power works.

When it comes to all this America Rules! speak, the one thing I like about everyone’s response to our current crisis is that we’re all saying America could be better. That first means admitting that America has faults. I guess it’s no longer unpatriotic to say so. This allows for a climate of discussion that was missing from the last election. Four years ago, it seemed like questioning our practices was the way not to get elected; now, the only workable platform is change.

But when I hear Republicans in power speak, it sounds like rambling avoidance completely lacking in understanding and honesty. How how how can you fight for deregulation for years, finally see the effects of that deregulation, and then demand government intervention to the tune of 700 billion dollars without ever admitting you were wrong?

Governor Palin is only a small part of this. Mostly it’s John McCain–the Maverick himself–and other Senate and House Republicans. Oh, and the President.

You hold opinions I don’t agree with. I understand. I don’t think you’re right. How could I possibly, when truth for me is nearly the opposite? But I respect you anyway. I would even respect you if you changed your mind. Honest people often change their minds.

So, you believe what you believe, and that’s okay. But, you’re going to have to defend yourself with reason and logic, you’re going to have to confess your assumptions, because many people oppose you. They think more like I do. They don’t trust in an economic theory that sounds good, but has never proven itself true. They especially don’t trust it now that they see their country in crisis. They saw it coming a long time ago. Why didn’t you?

In the study of theology and philosophy, we say that if your philosophy can’t explain the actual world you experience, then you need to change your philosophy. Anything less is intellectual dishonesty. You don’t block out science, experience, or opposing opinions simply because they threaten your own. If your worldview can’t account for these others, then it was always lacking.

I know things aren’t black or white. I’m not so sure you do. Just because I think people need help doesn’t mean I don’t value hard work. Just because I don’t support huge tax cuts for the rich doesn’t mean I support big government. Just because I don’t support the death penalty doesn’t mean I side with criminals. Just because I support gay marriage, doesn’t mean I think your marriage is less valid. Just because I don’t support the war, doesn’t mean I’m not patriotic. So much the opposite, really. I see what the United States is, and I see where the United States could be. We’re so far from that. As James Baldwin once said, “I love America more than any other country in this world, and, exactly for this reason, I insist on the right to criticize her perpetually.”

I don’t mean to put Democrats on high. They, too, are often corrupt. Joe Biden has said more dumb things than I can count. Barack Obama has–gasp!–been wrong. They make mistakes, they act in the interests of their egos, they play political games.

But, specifically in regards to Senators Obama and Biden, when they speak, I hear free-thinking people not afraid to disagree with each other, I hear honest assessments of problems and reasonable solutions, and I believe that they believe what they say. They don’t need to dodge questions, because answering honestly doesn’t threaten their chances of getting elected. I believe they understand the middle class, not because they wink at me, but because they have the policies and voting records to prove it.

There are ways, I’m sure, to be so academic that you are out of touch with common people. But, this is a stereotype I’ve rarely run into in the academy. The genius who can’t tie her own shoes? Pretty rare. So, don’t tell me, especially in our current crisis, that talking about economic philosophy makes one too academic, and therefore out of touch with common people. I, along with almost everyone I know, am part of the middle class, and we don’t play hockey or wield guns, so you’re going to have to relate on some other level.

I’m bound to be more forgiving of Biden and Obama, since I already agree with them, but, being as honest and objective as I can, I still think their talk is smarter, more straight forward, and far more relevant.

I was never going to be a Sarah Palin supporter. I can go through her list of stances on the issues, and I disagree with almost every single one (actually, I don’t think the “almost” is necessary). But, her performance at the debate left me with two conflicting conclusions: 1) she’s more relateable than I thought. I was nearly convinced that she’s more tolerant and less arrogant than the company she keeps. 2) She sounds like a puppet of McCain and other Republicans. This became particularly obvious when Palin could not respond to direct contradiction about why Obama had voted against funding for the troops, except to repeat the refuted statistics over again. I’m not looking for a VP who can repeat the views of the president. I’m looking for a VP with opinions of her own; Governor Palin has opinions, I know, so why should they be lost now?

In some ways, I understand why the American people are resistant to elect more Washington insiders. Hasn’t worked out too well for us in the last several years. But, shit, unless you think you’re capable of running the country yourself, then why would you put Governor Palin so close to the presidency?

When I was talking to my dad last week, I said that listening to Palin be interviewed on foreign policy, well, it was comprable to if Katie Couric had interviewed me on the same subject. I don’t know anymore than Palin does, but as much as I support jumping into the deep end and learning as you go, don’t drag an entire nation along with you! Know the limits of your own knowledge and experience. As the week went on, and more of these interviews were aired, I realized that I actually know more than Palin does. You think that’s who I want representing me?

I understand if you’re not totally on board with Obama-Biden like I am. But, aren’t they at the very least the lesser of evils?

One last note. Who ever heard of a team of mavericks? Isn’t that a total contradiction of terms?

If it’s not clear, my beef is with many of the Republicans in power–not all Republicans. And, I am supporting Obama and Biden–not all Democrats. When I hear Bush, McCain, and especially Palin speak, I feel like I’m being forced into one of two boxes: Joe six-pack American or Crazy Free-for-All Democrat. Neither of these fit me, and that’s what I’m reacting to. I feel like I’m being talked down to about this bail out plan, especially what led to it. I’m critical of how Democrats, too, are handling this economic crisis, but I’m relieved to hear many of them at least talking about the effects of neo-liberal economic theory. And, hey, maybe I am just a liberal snob in her little academic bubble.

If you read my post last Friday, then you know I was feeling a little blue. I spent that previous night dragging myself around work, appearing cheerful, but actually feeling like the wind had been knocked out of me. It seemed like too much effort just to hold my body up straight, so I was walking around the library kind of slumped over. I told my friend that I felt like Charlie Brown (or George Michael Bluth), and because this same friend and I have been joking about how I’m so emo now that I wear black nail polish, she replied, “You’re like an emo Charlie Brown.” That put a visual in my head, and later I googled “emo Charlie Brown” just for funsies. This is the picture I found, and I had to share it.

I’m feeling better now, and I want to thank you all for your kind comments. I wasn’t entirely comfortable makng such a whoa is me post, but it was helpful just to admit to myself and you all that I’m going through something. I’m always really hesitant to admit to others when I’m not happy. I guess because I don’t like providing explanations, especially when I don’t have any. I always feel the need to conclude with, “but, it’s really not that bad!” And, it’s not, but it is something.

Despite my recent doom and gloom mood, there were some bright spots this last week.

1. I saw Adorable Boy for the first time in several weeks. He’s actually more adorable–cuter and nicer–than I remembered. If you’re wondering why I don’t talk much about dating, it’s because there’s not much going on! I’m picky and not interested in wasting my time on people I’m not really interested in. So, I’ll probably die alone. No, not alone. I’ve already made retirement plans to live like the Golden Girls with my best friends.

2. The Office premiered this week! I didn’t get to watch it on Thursday night, because I had to work. Stupid responsibility! I finally saw it on Friday, and I was really happy with the episode. I think it’s going to be a good season. And, Toby. Oh, Toby. (More on TV tomorrow.)

3. The debate sealed it for me. I am loving this election. The consequences are still great, but I don’t feel quite as sick about the whole thing as I did in 2004. Maybe because we have a better chance this time around. My dad and I admitted to each other when we spoke on Saturday that we’re enjoying this election on an entertainment level, as well as a hopeful for change because we desperately need it level.

More and more all the time Barack Obama is becoming my candidate. I was always going to vote for him, but now I’m excited about his potential presidency. No one can turn things around as quickly as we’d all like, but he’s a candidate I agree with on most issues, and I think he’s very capable. At the debate, I was particularly impressed by his ease of intelligence, and his grace. He stood in stark contrast to McCain who was hesitant at first, and rambled and smirked throughout. No question who I want representing me to the rest of the world. But, to be sure, I don’t like Obama because he’s not McCain. I like him because I agree with him (with his assessment of the problems, and many of his proposed solutions), and I think he’s a good candidate for president.

I’m really looking forward to the VP debate on Thursday, though again (stupid job!), I won’t be able to watch it live. I was impressed for the millionth time by Biden when he responded to the question, “This is pretty much going to be a breeze for you. Will you use your kid gloves with Palin?” with a simple, “I would never act so condescendingly” (paraphrased). And, his reaction to all of McCain’s “Senator Obama doesn’t understand . . . I’ve been there, I know!” was to say, “I’ve been there too. It doesn’t mean you know” (paraphrased).

4. Finally, a literal bright spot in my week: I got my 88 Palette in the mail. That’s eyeshadow, if you don’t know. And, it’s so, so pretty. My terrible iPhone picture doesn’t do it justice, but see for yourself.

I lied! This couldn’t wait until Monday. t.k. foster asked for my thoughts on the debate, and I’ve been looking for an excuse to talk politics, so here I go. Correct me, argue with me, agree with me–whatever you want.

I’ll start with a confession. This was my first time watching a presidential debate. I started to get interested in politics as a senior in high school when I took AP Civics. 2004 was my first chance to vote in a presidential election, but by that time it had already become impossible for me to listen to George Bush speak without simultaneously cringing and boiling with rage. I know, very mature.

So, I am not objective. None of us are. If it’s possible, I swear I’m a natural-born Democrat. It’s somewhere in the heart of me. And, in my life now, I’m almost completely surrounded (both fortunately and unfortunately) by people who agree with me politically. I am part of a community of liberal/progressive Christians. Yeah, we do exist.

But, though I sometimes refer to myself as a crazy liberal, I’m really not crazy at all. Under my dad’s influence, I respect the traditional Republican platform of small government and fiscal conservatism, though it’s not usually where I fall myself. The Republican party now, however, or at least the part of it that’s making noise and electing people, I cannot respect. I see mostly hypocrisy and arrogance.

I was really excited to watch the debate, but I am no passive observer. 2004 left me devastated, and though I think we have a much better chance this time around, I am scared of another devastating outcome.

So, while not objective, I am a pretty reasonable person capable of at least trying to be objective. I make that attempt here.

• Let me begin with a second confession: I know nothing about debate. I mean, I have no formal training in debate, though I love to participate in debate, because a) I love to engage ideas, b) I like being right, and c) I like to win. What I do know is how to form an argument in a paper. By this standard, Obama won. He spoke clearly and in an organized fashion. He used examples that illustrated his points. He responded to his opponent’s arguments, even when that meant agreeing with McCain.

• Again by the standard of forming an argument, McCain failed by using small examples (what I would call folk stories) to make his points for him. I think you learn as a freshman in college that you don’t, for instance, let a quote argue for you. No, you use an example for support, and then you make the point yourself. This means clearly and directly stating your claim. Several times, I did not understand the points of John McCain’s stories. It’s important that you’ve been there, but what else can you say? Also, he seemed to ignore opposing arguments for which he had no answer, rather than refuting the argument or acknowledging that he might agree with his opponent. I am thinking specifically about the claim Obama made twice and Jim Lehrer brought up again, about tax cuts for the rich. Instead, he addressed only a small part of this argument: business tax cuts.

• This brings me to another point. What’s with the name dropping, John McCain? I understand on both sides that you do what you can to win. Succeeding at anything (unfortunately) means networking, and using the people you know to get ahead is legit in my book. But, use them effectively. Drop the name, and then make a valid point. John McCain certainly did this a few times, but for the number of names he dropped, he did not justify the half of them. All the unjustified historical references made him seem stuck in the past.

• I was slightly relieved to see more of the John McCain I feel comfortable with. I used to like John McCain, though I didn’t agree with him on many things. By this I mean that I had some trust in him. Then he started to become more and more like the current Republican party, which I cannot respect on nearly any point. Again, I understand that you do what you need to to get elected, but John McCain has become unpredictable to me. In my not unbiased opinion, John McCain has become a person who cares first about being elected and second about everything else. That’s not the McCain I used to trust. Anyway, seeing him disagree with the Bush administration, and call on many of the things he’s fought for over a long period of time, was refreshing.

• I guess on the other side of my point that McCain used examples without directly connecting them to points, he also made points that he left unsubstantiated. By this, I mean that he depended too heavily on “Senator Obama does not understand” and “What Senator Obama doesn’t seem to understand.” These are weak and repetitive claims. And, though Obama has been accused of depending too heavily on the concept of “change,” without clearly defining what changes, I think he–probably very tactically–avoided doing so in this debate.

• When it came to the economy, McCain was one note. Cut government spending. He said he would veto every request that crossed his desk, except for defense, veteran care, and “several other important causes.” Two problems here. First, ridiculously vague language. McCain is going to cut government spending, and clean out “those government programs.” Also, “them” and “those people” spending excessively. Second, is this your only response to the problem with the economy? A one note response doesn’t solve the smallest of problems, let alone the complex problem of our economy. He didn’t acknowledge fundamental problems in economic philosophy, besides government spending.

• Obama was not as sharp on the economy as I would have hoped, but he did recognize that this is not a new problem, and it will not be solved immediately. For me, he succeeded in recognizing both the necessity of immediate response and long term plans. He succeeded easily on the issue of the economy because McCain failed. McCain did not offer any real solutions besides cutting spending (oh yeah, except for defense and this huge bailout), and he did not respond fully to Obama’s criticisms.

• Here’s a difference in style. Obama several times acknowledged when McCain was right or when he agreed with him. He also several times acknowledged when, in his opinion, McCain got things wrong or represented him unfairly. John McCain did neither of these things, though he made several jabs at Obama. What does this mean? Rudy Giuliani, who Brian Williams interviewed afterwards because, as Williams said, the GOP did not provide Sarah Palin for interview, claimed that this was a show of McCain schooling Obama on foreign policy. I thought that was a freaking ridiculous claim, and that’s when I realized again that none of us are capable of objectivity.

• As for likability . . . this one surprised me a bit. McCain came off as his normal arrogant (I mean, confident!) self. I thought he was a few times quite patronizing. The little stories, especially the one about the soldier’s mom, were supposed to tug at the heart strings, but I was insulted that he thought I’d be won over by that and forget the more serious issues he was avoiding (this is a debate, after all, and not a rally speech). Obama was the surprise for me. I know this will sound like a strange criticism, but he seemed almost bogged down by the issues, and especially by correcting McCain. I think he was overcompensating for the claim that he speaks too generically about change, and for that he lost some opportunities to drive home the big consequences, especially of the economy, that are likely to hit home for Americans. He was also trying to prove himself on foreign policy, where McCain has been dominate.

• There’s no question for me that Obama is the better speaker and debater. And, whether they both have well-defined plans or not, Obama was far better at communicating his plans than McCain. I am sure it’s very hard to be both broad and specific under such a time constraint. You can never say all you want to say, you can never respond to every criticism, and you’re always left thinking, “if I just had more time!” Given this, of course neither candidate was perfect, but, in my opinion, Obama made better use of his time, and provided more constructive proposals.

• Though I think that Obama did a better job, and I was more impressed by him, no candidate clearly dominated. Interesting, since foreign policy is McCain’s issue, though, to be fair, this whole economic disaster did throw a stick into the spokes.

But, I’m not the demographic that the campaigns are targeting now. I’m a decided voter. We’ll have to see how the independents and undecideds respond.

ETA: The full debate is available now on hulu.com.