I am a really shy person. To me, that’s a fact as obvious as that I wear glasses. I just assume that everyone knows this about me. But, shyness is very complex and often misunderstood. In me, it mixes with introversion, so that it’s hard to say whether I’m alone because I like it that way or because I was too shy to make anything else happen.
I’m blog shy too. And I have no idea whether that’s obvious or not. I’m comfortable sharing a lot of myself here, but I am shy about relating to others. Just as in my real life, I feel like I make it too much work to get to know me. There are bloggers out there who I would love to be closer to, but I don’t know how to make that happen. I added a bunch of new people to my Reader, but then when it came to commenting and getting to know them, I felt like I was asking the cool kids if I could sit at their table at lunch. You all mean a whole lot to me and I don’t know if you know that, because I probably haven’t told you, at least not individually.
I don’t mean to overstate this, because as is always the case, I warm up to people and situations. It just takes me a while. I hear a lot of bloggers talk about themselves as if they’re on the outside, even if no one else perceives them that way, so maybe I’m not the only one who likes to think of myself this way. The whole truth is that I often feel quite at home in this strange community we’ve created for ourselves. I feel a lot closer to most of you than I do to many of the people I see every day.
All of this to say not just the normal you’re awesome and blogging changes lives, but the simple, I really like talking to you. This Summer, I’m kind of going mad as all of the things I’ve put off through the crazy school year compete for my time and attention, but talking to you all in comments and especially on twitter is keeping me sane. I was just thinking after reading some lovely comments on yesterday’s post that this week would have been a bad week, but talking to you made it not bad.
As many of you have experienced, I’ve spent the last couple Saturday nights with twitter and a bottle of wine, and had about the most fun ever, talking about Ashleys taking over the world, the merits of going to grad school, why we should make David Gray the leader of the world, my appreciation for my blogging anonymity, and just about everything else. Last Saturday we took it to the next creepy level and started texting, because twitter was just not enough. I’m basically myself while tipsy, but far more talkative. Like, one night twitter actually cut me off and said, “you need to stop talking for a while.” That’s a weird thing for a shy girl to hear.
What I’m saying is, let’s all be best friends, and I really think we should make this Saturday night twitter party a thing.
{ 28 comments… read them below or add one }
I think I really need to join in on this party sometime. You seemed like you were having the best time on Saturday! Good for you, thats wicked awesome.
Best,
Hannah Katy
This is what I get for not being home on the weekends, I miss all the festivities. Twitter while Tipsy (TWT) is the best kind as you never know what may happen.
Nice to know I’m not the only one who still feels like they’re being asked to sit at the cool kid’s table from time to time even if it really is just in our heads and silly.
I agree, the Saturday night twitter party should definitley be an often occuring event. Followed only by wine drinkings via skype. You’re not alone. I think a lot of us bloggers in our real lives are introverts and turned to blogging as a way to ourselves out there more. I dont know that I intended it to start out that way, but thats what it sort of morphed into. I never imagined the friends I would meet throughout my blog, some that I’ve never met but thats slowly changing and as meet ups happen, they are becoming real life friends.
On Saturday nights I seem to be either asleep before you get going on Twitter or I’m out of my apt! although you can always text me ;)
I TOTALLY need to join in on this. “I feel a lot closer to most of you than I do to many of the people I see every day.” Me too!! :)
Re: Saturday night Twitter party– done and done.
Don’t feel bad about not interacting, or commenting at least, on blogs though. I don’t comment nearly as much as I perhaps should, as someone who wants to be OUT THERE, but I often just don’t know what to say or if I’m saying anything really. Yes, commenting is good and should be done (esp. on my blog! haha), that you’re feeling good is just as important.
I wish I had a Blackberry or an iPhone! It would make twittering so much easier.
This is why I love blogging so much. I’m not the best at reaching out to people and making friends in person because I’m so shy and feel like I won’t have anything to say. But blogging is completely different; I feel comfortable here and it’s easier for me to express myself. I’m so happy that we’ve all found this great little community. :) I also love how our wine drinking Saturday nights have morphed into this great event!
And here I’m hoping to sit at the cool table that you’re at. Also, count me in for Saturday!
I understand what you mean; I’m often not good at letting people know that I like them either. But clearly you have a lot of people here who like you enough to read what you have to say, and I’m sure your input is valued on other blogs too. So you shouldn’t worry. I look forward to getting to know you better!
I wish there wasn’t like an eight hour time difference between us (the time I witnessed your twitter party, it was coming to an end and I was actually getting up in the morning!) because I would totally twitter party the heck out of a Saturday night with you.
Move to Scotland – go on!!! You know you want to… :)
You can sit at my lunch table any day, every day, Ashley! Hopefully I’ll be able to join one of your Twitter parties soon, but Twitter hasn’t really been nice to me lately…
Let’s all be friends! I feel so much of what you’ve said in this post. A lot of times I’ll just sit back and read a blogger for MONTHS without commenting once, just to get an idea of what they’re like. Then I’ll slowly start commenting here and there. I like interactive bloggers, the ones who acknowledge their commenters/readers and have conversations with them. To me, that’s the whole point.
Great post, Ashley!
YES! I totally identify with you and you basically just took my brain and regurgitated everything I was thinking yesterday into this blog post. (Fascinating visual, isn’t it?) I feel so much closer to Internet and blog friends than I do to my real life friends. Sometimes, it makes me feel weird saying that because it’s like I’m “living life through the computer screen.” I’m really not, I’m just more open on my blog than I am in my real life and have found connections to people through my blog that I don’t have IRL.
So I get you. And if I was a wine drinker, I would totally join in on the Saturday night Twitter party. Because reading your tweets are HILARIOUS!
Dude, fill me in next time there’s a Twitter party.
I text.
I tweet.
:)
Oh please please please let me be in on it next time! Now that I’m back in the states, I so want in!! :)
I really like talking to you too! LOL. I love talking to all my blogging friends. I think it’s great. I mean, I love my IRL friends, but I love my online friends too. At this point I just consider everyone to be my friend. It’s so much easier!
Yeah, you already know how I feel on this – it’s tough being a new kid on the block. Especially when you’re not really new! I blame my complete blog move/new identity on the web partially for that – there are still old blog friends who haven’t realised I’ve moved OR think I’ve disappeared. Agggh.
Thanks for your sweet comments on my last post. It was a sensitive one and you really helped me make sense of things a bit better. Big hugs!
Aw, Ashley, we all like talking to you too.
And I do enjoy your Twitter bursts. I often end up in at home on the same nights, its nice to not be the only one. :)
I loved seeing your tweets on Saturday night last week! Seriously =) I want to be best friends with you too. I had to laugh (in a good way) at the sitting with the cool kids comment because I *still* feel like that but it’s always totally silly because the gals (and guys) are always warm and welcoming!
I love that you’re reaching out a little more! I know that a lot of the time when I read a blog for a while I start putting the person up on a pedestal, to the point that I get all weird about being in touch with them! The (fantastic) reality is that the everyone is just some person behind a computer screen, hoping that other people like what they’re doing. Telling them that is a wonderful thing, and I’d say 7 times out of 10 people will jump at the chance to connect :)
I’m so down for Saturday night twitter parties!
Also, I love that we can now text if we want to. So holler whenever! I think you’re neat :)
Gah. I know the outsider feeling all too well. I tend to think everyone else has more friends and fun than I do. Then I talk to someone who thinks the same thing about me (I have more friends/fun) and I laugh because it really is more common than most people will talk about and at least we’re not alone in our feelings. (One of the reasons I love blogging!)
That being said, I have to echo Jamie’s words – text me whenever you want!
I rather enjoyed your Twitter party–feel free to start up again any time! I know what you mean about being shy–sometimes I think it seems like I’m aloof or not interested, but I just don’t know how to initiate things every now and then.
I was so bummed that I couldn’t talk to you last Saturday night! That said, I was really happy that you were doing it and I hope to get a chance to tweet & text in the near future.
By the by, I think I’m coming back to blogging.
Aww, I like talking to you too. A lot. :) Looooooove your blog. And definitely want in on the next Tipsy Twitter party! Great post.
haha. So let me get this straight…Ashleys are going to take over the world, but David is going to be the leader of the Ashleys? Hmmm, ok.
I’m just as shy as you are, and I open up just the same way. Sometimes it takes months for me to really open up to a person…but I think they realize it’s a privilege. What I’m saying is, the part of me that I feel is annoying (shyness), can also be an admirable quality in some odd ways.
Wait… so as a blogger, you’re shy, well read, you can drink and tweet simultaneously, you wear glasses, you are open as a writer and a quality one at that, and you’re making a conscious effort to become more social via this brave new web because you’ve been able to make real connections with people.
I don’t know how to break this to you, but you might just be one of the cool kids. ;)