I am a really shy person. To me, that’s a fact as obvious as that I wear glasses. I just assume that everyone knows this about me. But, shyness is very complex and often misunderstood. In me, it mixes with introversion, so that it’s hard to say whether I’m alone because I like it that way or because I was too shy to make anything else happen.
I’m blog shy too. And I have no idea whether that’s obvious or not. I’m comfortable sharing a lot of myself here, but I am shy about relating to others. Just as in my real life, I feel like I make it too much work to get to know me. There are bloggers out there who I would love to be closer to, but I don’t know how to make that happen. I added a bunch of new people to my Reader, but then when it came to commenting and getting to know them, I felt like I was asking the cool kids if I could sit at their table at lunch. You all mean a whole lot to me and I don’t know if you know that, because I probably haven’t told you, at least not individually.
I don’t mean to overstate this, because as is always the case, I warm up to people and situations. It just takes me a while. I hear a lot of bloggers talk about themselves as if they’re on the outside, even if no one else perceives them that way, so maybe I’m not the only one who likes to think of myself this way. The whole truth is that I often feel quite at home in this strange community we’ve created for ourselves. I feel a lot closer to most of you than I do to many of the people I see every day.
All of this to say not just the normal you’re awesome and blogging changes lives, but the simple, I really like talking to you. This Summer, I’m kind of going mad as all of the things I’ve put off through the crazy school year compete for my time and attention, but talking to you all in comments and especially on twitter is keeping me sane. I was just thinking after reading some lovely comments on yesterday’s post that this week would have been a bad week, but talking to you made it not bad.
As many of you have experienced, I’ve spent the last couple Saturday nights with twitter and a bottle of wine, and had about the most fun ever, talking about Ashleys taking over the world, the merits of going to grad school, why we should make David Gray the leader of the world, my appreciation for my blogging anonymity, and just about everything else. Last Saturday we took it to the next creepy level and started texting, because twitter was just not enough. I’m basically myself while tipsy, but far more talkative. Like, one night twitter actually cut me off and said, “you need to stop talking for a while.” That’s a weird thing for a shy girl to hear.
What I’m saying is, let’s all be best friends, and I really think we should make this Saturday night twitter party a thing.