I’ve been reading Julie and Julia. It’s the book the movie was based on and the book itself is, in a sense, based on Julie Powell’s blog The Julie/Julia Project where she blogged her way through Julia Child’s Mastering the Art of French Cooking. The book is actually a memoir that extends beyond the blog. A lot of controversy surrounds Julie Powell, all of which I am at least 5 years late in learning about. There was controversy when her blog, which she started in 2002, became a success. More when she was given a book deal. More when the book was a success and then picked for a movie. More when the movie came out. And, even more controversy when she, most recently, published a book about butchering and her own adultery. Throw in a couple editorials and some unflattering things she’s said about other food blogs (that they’re boring) and you get a lot of Julie Powell haters.
All the controversy seems pretty ridiculous to me. I don’t buy that Julie does everything–or started a blog in freaking 2002–just to get major media attention. Or that she’s undeserving of that attention. Or that her writing is less valid because she’s not an expert chef. I also don’t buy that everything she’s done should be valued highly because she was just being honest. Honesty doesn’t alleviate you of the responsibility you have for your own words and actions; they may in the very least make you unlikable to other people, and in a lot of ways, Julie is pretty unlikable. Not everything Julie has done has been honorable and not everyone who criticizes her is just jealous of her success.
What’s most ridiculous is the way so much of the criticism revolves around Julie as a person. When you put yourself out there, people are going to react. I get that. And as I’ve already said, Julie doesn’t always present herself as the most likable person, but it’s like, why do people think that their opinions of her are so important that they must by any means necessary make sure she knows just how much they don’t like her?1 She writes what she thinks usually with at least some degree of self-awareness and self-condescension; she doesn’t go around kicking puppies or murdering people. If I was Julie, I no doubt would have retreated into my shell by now with no plans to emerge.
But, Julie, it seems, has really never presented herself as someone to be put on a pedestal. Her criticism of the movie Julie and Julia (a criticism for which she was, of course, sharply criticized) was that Amy Adams did a great job, but the character she portrayed and that Nora Ephron wrote was not Julie. She played sweet and cute, and that’s not Julie, in the book or in reality.
This is a very long-winded way of getting around to my point. I don’t think blogging is embarrassingly self-important, and neither is it courageous. Being honest is sometimes hard, because it would be nice to write about the person you want to be instead of the person you are, the way you should feel instead of the way you do feel. Sometimes you know how people will react and it’s hard not to throw up a bunch of disclaimers to cut them off. You want to be likable even while writing about the less-than-flattering aspects of your life and personality.
I know that I sometimes compare myself to other bloggers and think I’d rather be like Amy Adams than Julie Powell. I would present a pastel lifestyle with perfect pictures and sophisticated design and fashionable clothes and fun recipes and cozy, comfort-filled activities all described with cute language. The kind of life you could put a bow on. I don’t disbelieve the bloggers who present lives like this; they are as real as anyone else. The problem is with me wanting to be like them when the truth is that I eat like crap, there is no art on my walls, I almost never take relaxing baths or drink herbal tea, and I’m allergic to flowery language.
As much as I believe we always are who we really are, blogging gives me a unique opportunity to explore who I am. It is an experiment in extreme honesty, and I love it most when I write about whatever I want whether it fits with an idea I have about what this blog is or should be or who I am or should be. And, thank goodness for Liz Lemon who’s made it okay to laugh at our worst habits. Only, am I the one only one who eats chips for dinner and thinks, “I’m so like Liz Lemon,” before I remember that Liz Lemon has a kick-ass job, lives in an awesome apartment in NYC, and, well, looks like the beautiful and tiny Tina Fey, which means that I am actually on a level much lower than Liz Lemon. Ah well.
- Witnessing the formspring experiences of other bloggers makes me realize this kind of reaction isn’t reserved just for the most famous of bloggers. [↩]
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Thats interesting – I was watching the extras on the DVD (yeah I am strange and do that for most of my new DVDs!!) Julie Powell seems really excited that Amy Adams was playing her (although they are so different etc) and to a certain degree as it was explained that Julia Childs is like how Julie imagines her to be – Nora Ephron was probably just using the information she was given to create this character.
Aah well I loved the film – it got me cooking again (I went home from the cinema and made scrambled eggs on toast and a cake. One of my things on my 101 in 1001 days list is to cook Boeuf Bourginon – I feel sorry for my OH and housemate who might be eating it lol)
P.s. I also kinda question did Julia Childs actually say that she hated Julie’s blog or was that artistic license – in 2002 she [Julia] was 90. My Grandma is 70 and doesn’t get the jist of the whole blog thing – maybe she just didn’t get it at the time.
I totally agree that through blogging, we are experimenting and trying to figure out who we are. I recently deleted a blog I had, mainly due to a guy. (plus, he was kinda stalking it…creeeepppy!!) But the fact that HE didn’t even embrace or appreciate my writing really makes me mad now. If you don’t let others respect you, then who will?
“Being honest is sometimes hard, because it would be nice to write about the person you want to be instead of the person you are, the way you should feel instead of the way you do feel. Sometimes you know how people will react and it’s hard not to throw up a bunch of disclaimers to cut them off. You want to be likable even while writing about the less-than-flattering aspects of your life and personality.”
Thank you SO much for writing about this – I’d been contemplating something similar recently but I wasn’t sure how to word it… I find that so often there are bloggers who present their lives and their personalities through rose-tinted glasses; everything seems like a… story. It’s lovely writing, but it’s not real. I know I’m not the most popular blogger in the world, and maybe that is because I write about the bad or difficult times as well as the good – but I’d so much rather be true to who I am than pretend I’m someone I’m not for the sake of popularity.
Loved this post my dear!
Considering I basically agree with you on EVERY point here… I will just say, “Well said and thank you for writing this.”
:D
It’s tough when people put themselves out there, because they become open to so much criticism, and while criticism can be totally valid, it often isn’t. I think the media is really poor at times about focusing on what actually matters, instead getting too personal or sensationalist. Actually, so is the public. I can’t imagine why anybody would want to be really famous, but apparently everyone does. I suppose some people genuinely don’t care what others say about them.
Thankfully it is possible to blog without becoming a part of that world, if you don’t want to. Which is weird when you consider how hostile much of the internet can be. Still, you seem to be doing pretty well, flowery language or not. :)
I just had a million conflicting and random thoughts about what you wrote. So I will spit them back up, in conflicting and random notes:
-I hated the book. Couldn’t stand it. Maybe it’s because even though, as you said “She was being honest”, in the beginning of the book she writes that she doens’t always tell the truth. Or something to that effect. So which is it?
-If they would’ve made her character in the movie as she is in real life, would anyone have seen the movie? Or rather, would as many people? I mainly saw it BECAUSE I adore Amy Adams.
-You’re right, blogging honestly is hard, in fact (and I use today’s post as an example) sometimes it’s downright embarassing. Which I guess makes it hard when people criticize. But I guess that’s people’s right.
I really don’t understand the Julie Powell hate, or the Elizabeth Gilbert hate, or the hate of any blogger, really. I mean, the red X in the right corner exists for a reason…people should use it.
I think it’s difficult to find a balance of honesty without taking the direct route to Train Wreck central. I mean, I try to be self-deprecating and honest about where I’m at, but I also don’t want to detail the things I really hate about myself or my life in such explicit detail. Still, I do read a lot of bloggers who seem to present their lives as all roses and sunshine, and that…well, either I’m really jealous or really sad for them that they can’t be honest.
Very thought-provoking.
This was a really well-written & thought out post, Ashley. It’s very difficult to be a blogger, be true to yourself, and NOT get some criticism here and there. I think Julie Powell was successful because she tried something new, got people interested, and touched people with how relatable she really is. She’s not perfect. She’s very flawed, but she’s also real. I admire that much more than people that make their lives seem perfect. I also think you do a wonderful job staying true to yourself on your own blog – so thank you for that!
I’m in journalism school and people are constantly like “oh blogging is for people who are egotistical” “oh only someones mother reads their blog” it frustrates me SO MUCH. You just cannot fully understand blogging and the blogging community unless you are a part of it yourself.
That being said, I was not a fan of Julie and Julia the book, I did not enjoy how bitchy Julie came off in it towards her husband! The movie was great though, IMO.
I adore Liz Lemon as well! I have eaten chips and cheese for dinner before :)
And if Liz Lemon existed in real life no way would she have that apartment in NYC, she (being Tina Fey) has even admitted to that in her commentary on 30 Rock episdoes. (Am I a dork for knowing that!?)
I’d rather be an Amy Adams than Julie Powell as well; some days I am, others not so much. And no matter who you are, I like you for you! (And I think that you write beautifully & honestly without the flowery language :) )
I actually adore the Julie & Julia Movie so much that I’m almost afraid to read the book now! I’m not even the biggest fan ever of Amy Adams, but she plays a not always likeable character in a very likeable (sp?) way. I heart Meryl Streep, so that may be why I love the movie so much as well :D
This post is so well written and spot on. I haven’t found my blogging voice yet (and okay, in all fairness, my blog has been in existence for less than three months), but I want to be somewhere in between. I want the good and the bad. I want cozy sunshine-y-ness mixed with some nitty gritty. Really, that is me and that is my life: mostly good but definitely not all just cozy little craft projects and tea. I read blogs that are all one or the other and sometimes I get weary of the one-note aspect.
Love the graph with this sentence: “The kind of life you could put a bow on.”
One thing I’ve tried to do with my blog is be as honest and real as possible, which includes delving into issues that are hard to discuss at times. I don’t try to show everyone that I have a perfect life and everything is grand. Nobody’s life is like that all the time. I enjoy reading blogs who present a real life where things are up and down and nothing is always perfect.
I start reading a blog because I am curious about a person. I keep reading it because I grow to care about a person. If I feel like a person isn’t being genuine, I just can’t get into a blog–I want to know the good times, but I also want to know when someone is having a rough time so I can try in my own little paltry way to provide comfort. I know no one really lives rosy, cheery lives, and it’s frustrating to read blogs that only convey that side of a life, and it’s why I stopped writing at my old blog–I felt like it was going in that direction because of who my audience was.
Indeed, blogging is a very effective way of exploring ourselves. When I started bloggging a few months ago, I’ve never anticipated the challenges I will face as well as my capacity to overcome all difficulties. I have discovered a lot of things about myself that I would have not known, should I not pursued my blog. :-)
To thine own self, be true. I think believing in that will match what you want to be very closely with who you are.
But this post got me thinking: What if the more we all talk about trying to be a certain kind of person, with bloggy anecdotal support, that we are indeed becoming who we want? In that way, a blog becomes a tool in discovering who we are in a way we probably won’t expect.
Just a thought.
I believe honesty is simply endearing. I may not agree with a person, but if they are being completely honest (which in a way also shows vulnerability and openness), I’m going to at least RESPECT THEM.
I sort of touched on this topic just the other day when I wrote a post about self-branding in the blogging world and the negativity that may come out of it. I agree with you, though. Blogging is self-exploratory and courageous and scary and amazing and sometimes puts you in a rut all at the same time, but I don’t know that I’d have it any other way either. As always, great post!
The range of topics, what touched different people and who feels strongly about what…your comments make my point. It’s a big world out there in Blogland and there’s room for everyone. Viva la difference I say!
I really liked this post (I know I’m a little late to the party) and the points you’re making. These ideas of authenticity are very important, especially to blogging but to all forms of writing/art/creation as well. But this is something that we will always struggle with, and you merely strive to find some kind of balance or point where the bad does not affect the good.
Also, another reminder that I need to see the film (or, perhaps more importantly, read the book) because based upon what you’ve said, it sounds really interesting.
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