I stole this idea from @francoBeans. The minute I read his post, I started thinking of reasons you wouldn’t like me. Not quirky things you might find adorable, but genuine reasons not to like me. It’s time for some hardcore honesty.
- I am incredibly selfish with my time. I like to be alone a lot. Even if I really like you, I’m going to disappoint you by not being around or not returning your calls occasionally. This may make you think that I don’t like you, but that’s not true. I’m just selfish and preoccupied with whatever I’m thinking, feeling, dreaming, doing.
- I love to debate, even if I don’t always have a really firm grasp of what I’m talking about. I’m not a total BSer and I will usually admit when I’m not sure about something, but occasionally I get caught up in the moment. I’m not going to back down and sometimes it might take me a little too long to admit when I’m wrong.
- I am irritated by women who can’t be friends with other women and also women who are scared of the word feminism.
- I don’t care about the things you could have done. What does it matter that you got accepted to a good school if you didn’t attend? Who cares if you had promise but never did anything with it? What does it matter that you have a novel in you, but will never write it? Do it. Try. Work hard. That’s what we’ll admire you for.
- I am generally very even tempered. I might sometimes seem distracted, but I’m usually very cheerful. If you live with me, though, you’ll know that I can be quite moody, especially when I’m around people a lot. There are times (and they aren’t rare) when I don’t want to talk and if forced to, I will probably be irritable. During such times, the worst thing you can do is ask me a lot of questions. I will glare at you and give you one word answers like an emo teenager.
- I am judgmental of most Republicans and conservative Christians.
- I am very PC. Not to the extreme that it’s not okay to talk about anything, but I think language matters and I think calling people what they want to be called is important. This is not to be confused with thinking everything is relative; go ahead and disagree with what someone does or thinks, but don’t undermine your own argument by using pejorative language from the start.
- This one I’m stealing from f.B. I notice everything: your mismatched clothes, your not very well-straightened hair, and your bad grammar. I used to be super critical about all of these things. Now, I barely care. But, I definitely notice.
- I don’t like most foods. I mean, I love to eat, but I eat such a small variety of foods and I am not adventurous at all. I am the girl who will choose the Americanized fast food option over the real thing.
- The one thing I am very conservative about is work. I am critical of people who choose not to work, including students, mothers, etc. And since we’re being honest here, I mean paid work and not volunteering; to me, they are not the same. Strangely, my criticism has always been aimed more toward middle and upper class people and not the poor on government assistance. If I can defend myself on this one, I’m sure it has everything to do with my own identity being tied too closely to work.
- In nearly everything, I fall on the side of insecurity rather than arrogance, but not in my ability to read people or a situation. I probably think I know you better than you know you. I’ll never say it, I’ll know it’s illogical, but I’ll believe it anyway.
- I don’t know what to make of people who look at the bright side of everything and are not willing to really acknowledge the bad. Usually they are willing and I realize that after knowing them for a while, but until I see it, I’m suspicious. At a certain point, I might try to force it out of them.
- I have never respected anyone for just telling it like it is. More like this is how I justify being an asshole. Honest people just tell the truth; they don’t need to announce to the world what they’re doing as if saying it relieves them of the responsibility they have for the damage their words might do.
- I am super introspective and very often don’t say what I’m thinking. Or say much of anything at all. People often have to ask me what I’m thinking to get me to say something. Or they have to ask me a bunch of questions that I don’t do a good job of asking back. I’m more likely to go home and write my thoughts, but you know I’m thinking something. When I’ve been on the other side of a person like myself, it’s driven me mad.
- I am nervous publishing this post, because I care what people think of me. And I don’t believe a single person who says he/she doesn’t. The louder they scream about how much they don’t care what people think, the more I hear, “I care desperately about what people think of me.”
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Number one is soooo me too!!!
Because I’m terribly bored and this looks like fun. It’s going to be long however, so feel free to delete it if you want or skip reading.
1. Being selfish is okay, sometimes I think it’s even best. And if selfish means being alone a lot, then it’s definitely good. I personally cannot stand clingy people. I like my independence a bit too much, which is why I’m afraid to ever have children.
2. I hate debating. I’m usually the one who listens to both sides of the story, has my own opinions and thoughts but never really vocalizes them because I just don’t feel the need to. I might write about them later on, but debates I try to stay out of.
3. I used to be one of those women – well, girl. I disliked girls when I was a child. I only played with boys because they were more level headed and liked adventurous biking. Girls would cry the minute their little pinky was touched. I hate it. I hated being around people who cry – especially the shrieking kind of crying. That has changed now, but I definitely don’t think that there is anything wrong with women who just don’t feel comfortable around other women and choose to have mainly male friends. Sometimes, you just can’t help it. At the same time, I too dislike women who aren’t comfortable with the word feminism.
4. I don’t think it’s important to dwell on what could have been, but I do rather care about what could have happened. Not so much when it comes to what could have happened to me, but to other people. I care about it because it often shows pain, a side of people that you normally wouldn’t see. I don’t like it when all that people can talk about is what could have been, but if they don’t talk about it, I’m interested.
5. I’m very moody. I’ve always been, and I hate it. Sometimes I’m in such bad moods that I retreat from the whole world, and when that happens, good luck trying to talk to me. I’ll probably yell at you or something equally extreme. As I think I already told you once, I’m definitely extreme, in everything that I do, not just my moods.
6. I hate politics. But when I try to pay attention because I think that’s what all the smart people do – know politics – I usually find myself a bit on the offensive side whenever someone trashes the Liberals.
7. PC = Publicly Correct? In that case, most of the time I am too, but I do let loose sometimes and it feels nice.
8. This one I do agree with. I think most people notice everything, but few care enough to even register it. I do notice everything, and depending on what I notice, I might even call you out on it. I would like to be called out on it too, because otherwise I might go on looking like a idiot for the rest of my life. But then again, I think I take criticism rather well – at least from strangers and acquaintances.
9. Yes, a fellow pre-packed meat lover, instead of a nice steak? My friends and family think I’m crazy because I’d rather eat fake packaged meat than the real juicy thing. The real juicy thing disgusts me. I’m very much a texture person – so if it’s slimy in the slightest sense, I can’t touch it. And, if it looks gross, please don’t even eat in front of me, it’ll ruin my appetite.
10. Hmm, I’m not judgmental of those who choose not to work, sometimes I’m even a bit jealous. Although I’ve worked since I was in high school and throughout my entire University career, and I do enjoy working for the most part, I would hate to have a 9-5 job. I like working and I like working hard – it’s very gratifying, but I like making my own hours. I’m not good at complying with the rules of someone else. I mean, I’m good at it – I’m always the one who comes at least 15 minutes before my shift starts and I do my job well – but, I hate having to come in at a certain hour because that’s when I’m needed. I’m very stubborn but I rarely show it.
11. Funny, I think I’m the best at reading people and more often than not, I know for a fact that I know everyone better than they know themselves. Sometimes I merely look at people and I think I know them. Yeah, I do realize it’s crazy, but like you, I believe it. It would be rather interesting if we ever met, we’d both think we knew each other better. Perhaps we already think that? Maybe not, not if you haven’t read anything on my blog. But maybe after reading this long comment, you will have opinions. And that’s perfectly fine.
12. This is a tricky one. Looking on the bright side is something I want to be able to do, which is one reason I started my blog. I want to be able to see the beauty in everything, which is a form of looking on the bright side of everything. I guess I merely look at “looking at the bright side” as another few words for anchoring your thoughts. Kind of like positive thinking. When something goes wrong, I want to be able to see the good side of it too, but I fully realize and admit the bad. I mean, it’s there, how could I not?
13. I agree – honest people tell the truth without needing to let the world know they tell the truth. This has always made me suspicious too. If you’re telling the truth, then why would you need to let us know that? Perhaps because you’re in fact not telling the truth. At the same time, I admire someone who tells it like it is. I like honest people. I like people who will not sugar coat things. But I don’t like people who tell me that they’re telling the truth.
14. Same. Although I do make a very hard effort to ask questions back – sometimes I just don’t have anything to ask. I’m a firm believer of only talking when it’s necessary, so I hate all the little chit chat that our society does just because it’s friendly. Still, I comply because I don’t like to stand out. I hate attention, so I just drift into the background and watch. Yup, I’m that girl sitting by myself, watching the world go on its merry way. Or sometimes not merry way. Whatever. I just like to watch. I don’t like to talk, only when I have something to say. Then you can’t shut me up. I appreciate friends that I can be with in the same room, both doing our own little thing, barely saying a word to each other, yet still enjoying every minute of it. Thankfully, I have a couple of those.
15. Yeah, I care what people think of me to a certain degree. I mean, it is natural, and I too do think that anyone who says they don’t is most likely very insecure. But I care more so about what people think of the way I look and what I do. For example, I may care and be very insecure if I had to go outside without my hair done. It takes me less than 2 minutes to do my hair, but sometimes, the power goes out here in Georgia and then I cannot use my hair straightener. Or, I care about my answer to the question “What do you do?” because I feel that I haven’t accomplished much. Of course, living with someone who is a Professor already is a bit hard – I just have my BA. I rarely think about the fact that he’s also 10 years older. In 10 years, who knows where I’ll be and what I will accomplish. But the fact of the matter is, that people don’t know my age when they ask that question, and when my answer sucks, I know they judge. Or at least, I think they judge. When it comes to speaking my mind and letting people know how I think and what I think, I don’t really care what they think. I’ve always valued my thoughts and opinions, but never my physical appearance or my accomplishments. My insecurities.
You’re right… everyone cares what other people think. But the really brave ones do what they think is good and right in spite of that.
So congratulations on publishing the post.
Um, I think I am a lot like you as I agree with/am the same about a lot of these. So I would like you!
Number 1 is definitely me, and 14. Probably it is annoying for other people, but I’m ok with it.
This was a great idea for a post too.
Umm… I work harder at jobs that I don’t get paid for than most people do at their jobs… and in my opinion, I also perform more necessary tasks than most of my friends with real jobs. Just saying!!!
But… I like your list a lot and give you a lot of credit for posting it. Props, yo. :)
I adore this post and love that you were so completely honest. I can relate to a lot of those especially the being very selfish with your time one. I also agree with the telling it like it is one.
Wow, this must have been hard to write. I don’t think I would be able to do this about myself. I guess maybe I’ll try.
Anyway – I’d still be friends with you.
Bravo for putting it all out there! We all have our “weaknesses” but I think it’s so important to realize them and own up to it. Great post idea!
We have a lot in common as far as enjoying our “me time” goes. I grew up entertaining myself with stories and dolls and I think that has made me more self sufficient in terms of friends. I have a hard time being there for someone all the time.
I also think that people who “tell it like it is” are making excuses for being abrasive assholes. The sad thing is, usually they seem to know that they are assholes, but are perfectly happy justifying it.
I don’t think most of those are that bad. The one that would annoy me is being judgmental of people with different political beliefs, because I think it’s really important to try to respect and understand even those you disagree with completely. It can be hard though, definitely. Anyway, well done on writing this; it was very honest. I’m not sure I could give people a list of reasons not to like me; they probably have enough of their own already.
Each post makes me admire you more. You’re awesome. DFTBA
YES for emo teenager impressions.
In nearly everything, I fall on the side of insecurity rather than arrogance, but not in my ability to read people or a situation. I probably think I know you better than you know you. I’ll never say it, I’ll know it’s illogical, but I’ll believe it anyway.
One of my good friends is like that. It does piss me off.
Wow, this was a great post! It makes me want to go post one of my own. I might continue the idea and make it my Friday post.
I agree with some of the things you’ve listed and not so much with others. It all comes down to perspective I suppose.
I love this. #5 is so me it’s weird. Actually, #3 is probably the only one of these with which I can’t connect.
How very brave of you to post this. I wouldn’t be able to do it, I think, post things people would hate about me. I’m too insecure for that.
And yet after all of these reasons for me not to like you – I still adore you.
So, I have to say, I agree with a lot of these: #1, #3, #5, #8, #9, and #11. I love how similar we are!
#6, I’m more of the opposite. I’m very critical of liberals and Democrats. Ha! Oh, and #10, because I would love to be a stay-at-home mother (which is, in my opinion, a LOT harder than being a working mother. And it takes a lot more out of a person. But it’s just my opinion!)
I think I’m going to do one of these, hehe. :)
I hear ya… definitely on numbers 1 and 2!!
God, this post made me love you more. We are waayyyy similar in our “negatives.” Well done.
We must be the same person.
Why is it so hard to explain #1 to people! I just had to have a talk about this recently.
…I am so many things on this list, it’s sort of scary.
Oh (I jumped the gun hitting “submit”), which likely means we wouldn’t get along ’cause I sometimes don’t like people who are too much like me, ha.
Wow, this post is really honest. That’s brave.
Browsing through you blog after seeing it featured on 20sb. I’m definitely adding your blog to my reader.
#1. I’m exactly like you. Go introverts! We’re a misunderstood group.
#3. Amen.