I was at Target several weeks ago, and I happened upon some cute socks that were on clearance. They were striped and adorable and marked down to only a couple dollars, so I didn’t debate long before I put them in my basket and moved along. It wasn’t until I was up at the register getting ready to pay when I remembered that I have a whole drawer full of cute socks at home, and I can’t remember the last time I wore any of them. It’s then that it hit me: I don’t live in Washington anymore. I live in California. It’s hot here all the time. I don’t wear socks because I live in California where it is hot all the time.
You might have noticed from my regular use of “and then I realized” and “and then it hit me” that I’m quite prone to sudden realizations. Maybe it’s because my head is too often in the clouds. Or, maybe it’s just a normal human thing. I’ve had the sudden realization that I live in California at least a dozen times, but I just can’t seem to get it through my head. I don’t wear socks anymore. My once great hooded sweatshirt collection sits abandoned in my closet. There are now California plates on my car. I have a California driver’s license. I voted in the last election as a Californian. And, I have no plans to live anywhere else in the foreseeable future.
There are several reasons why I’ve been slow to accept that I live in California. First, I never thought I would live here. I didn’t think I was a California kind of person. I just never got the allure. Second, when you’re still in school, it’s very easy to adopt an attitude of temporariness. School seems like just a phase to pass through before real life begins. It’s a little more confusing when you add 7 years of grad school onto the end of that, but the attitude doesn’t go away. And, third, for a long time I didn’t know if I would be staying here or moving on to some other new place. For that reason, I made very few moves to put down roots.
Now that it looks like I’ll be living here for at least the next four years, but very likely for much longer than that, I feel like I should embrace being a Californian. Maybe this will sound weird, but I’m not very good at embedding myself in a location. My favorite things to do? Read, write, blog, watch TV, listen to music . . . all of which I can pretty much carry on doing in exactly the same way no matter where I am. Exploring new places, trying new restaurants, and really experiencing a place are all things out of the ordinary for me. (This is why I suck at vacation.) And, for how much attention I pay to politics, I really know nothing about what’s happening locally. When people ask me what it’s like to have Arnold Schwarzenegger for a governor, I have nothing to say, so I just break into my story about having a big crush on him in the Terminator days.
The reason I want to become more embedded here is not just so I’ll have something to say when someone asks for a restaurant recommendation, but because, shockingly enough, I really like it here in California. Much more than I ever thought I would. It’s so many different things at one time. I love especially my small city with all its colleges. And it should not come as a surprise to remember that you live in the place you do!
All of this reminds me of a quote from How I Met Your Mother where pretentious college freshman-aged Ted says, “My parents live in Ohio. I live in the moment.”
Answers to Questions You Might Have
- No, I didn’t buy the socks.
- Yes, I do sometimes wear socks, but very rarely and mostly only when I workout. This became apparent to me when I did 3 weeks worth of laundry and I only had two pairs of socks to put away.
- No, it isn’t always sunny in Southern California (but it is in Philadelphia!). Just most of the time. Growing up in Western Washington, I always hated hearing people say that it rains constantly in Seattle. I had to be the snotty girl going, “It doesn’t rain all the time.” But, then I moved away for a year and came back, and oh my gosh it rains all the time there! It’s just like that in Southern California with the sun.
- Yes, seven years of grad school. It is ridiculous that I could be a medical doctor much faster than I can get a PhD in the humanities.
- Yes, I did really have a crush on Arnold. I even wrote him a letter, which my dad promised he’d mail.
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{ 20 comments… read them below or add one }
I should probably start offering you “How to be a Californian” classes, I’m pretty good at it you know (I was one for 18 years). But, then again, there are so many nuances to California and in particular the NorCal/SoCal dichotomy. But the key to everything is knowing that you live in probably the coolest and best state in the US, and realizing that everyone is jealous bc you get to live there and they don’t, haha.
Also, you’re going to get a chance to get really caught up on CA politics bc of the gubernatorial election in 2010. At least on the Democratic side, you’ll get a good cross-section of the state with Diane Feinstein, Jerry Brown and Gavin Newsom. I’ve debated re-registering in CA to vote (at my mom’s address) so I can vote in the Democratic primary. But if you follow what’s going on in that race, as well as accepting that the whole political process in the state is a little crazy but that it’s still awesome, then you’ve got being a Californian down.
California sounds beautiful to me. Husband never wants to go, and I’ve only been once (L.A.) … and it was raining that day.
I wear socks almost all the time (unless I decide to wear flip-flops). This week, it has been in the low 70s, which is completely odd for July. It was actually COLD this morning. So, socks have been a must. Bonus points for cute socks.
Aaah this makes me homesick (esp the pic)! I’m holding onto my california plates and liscence as long as I can! But yeah, I could be a medical doctor in less time than it takes to get a PhD in the biomedical sciences, too. Sigh.
As a native Californian, I’ve always found it difficult to wear socks. Even when I lived in Chicago for five years, I’d take my shoes and socks off whenever I could. Last year, when I was pregnant, I developed a rare condition that made my whole body itch, but especially my feet and hands (sounds great right?) and I couldn’t stand having socks on my feet, even though it was winter. I must say, I haven’t gone back to socks since.
I love me some Arnold.
A lot.
I’ve never ever envisioned myself living in Cali. It doesn’t sound bad, but I think I would miss the seasons. I’m glad that you’ve chosen to put down roots. 7 years is a long time and its crazy that it requires less time to be a medical doctor!
I may be biased (I am) but I think CA is extremely fantastic. If you would like recommendations on things to do, places to eat, or where to go for an awesome pedicure – just ask! I’m a Southern Californian at heart (26 years living here) and just recently a NorCal girl so I have plenty of “favorites” in the LA/Pasadena area!
Ha. I can completely relate to this post. Growing up in Texas, I really never wore socks. Then when I moved to NYC, I gradually incorporated them into my wardrobe, but only during the winter months. Now that I’m back in Texas I think I have about 3 pairs of socks to my name.
I suck at vacation too. I’m a real homebody. I read, watch TV, blog, and play video games. I love to go out to eat, but I’m very picky about the things I DO eat, and I consider going grocery shopping a ‘day trip’.
My boyfriend is in the Army National Guard, and he wants to join the active Army when he gets home from Iraq. I don’t know where that’ll take us, but it scares me, the idea of moving away from my family (we’re wicked close, my dad and sister are two of my best friends in the universe). How did you do it?
I feel the same about living in Louisiana. Until about a year ago I really thought I was moving back to MN. But when I decided I loved it to much I started going to more places, doing the touristy thing (even though I have lived here for almost 7 years now), and got to know the surrounding towns.
It will take time to really get to know a place, but it will be worth it in the end.
Oh, and I never wear socks either. I think I have worn one pair in about 2 months, because I went running.
The only socks I’ve worn this summer are for work.
This post really made me smile today. =)
I’m so glad I found your blog and participated in the 20sw group. Thanks Ashley!
I love the How I Met Your Mother quote.
I live in flip flops. It is a problem when people want to go bowling–I never have socks and have to scrounge around for a pair!
Ha ha, I read the blog post title and went me either! But that’s only cuz it’s summer… Texas can get cold.
I’ve always wanted to go to California. Sounds lovely. Maybe one day..
no socks, understandable- arnold crush, totally not. lol.
I want to say I’d love living in a place where it’s hot all the time, but I know it’s just because it’s winter here now and I’m c-c-c-c-cold!
Also, I totally had a crush on Arnold too.
I feel exactly the same way. I have problems identifying with living in my hometown and working full-time. I honestly don’t feel like I really graduated last year and everything feels so temporary. Like you, I need to accept reality and put down some roots.
But did he mail it….?
For at least the first year I lived here in NC, it felt like a busy vacation. Everything was new, I still didn’t know anything, and it took a long time to settle in. Sometimes even now, two years as an NC resident, it doesn’t feel like I’m permanently here. Maybe that’s just part of growing up and moving elsewhere.
I’m a little late to the party, but I hope California has turned out okay for you. Been living here all my life and I can’t wait to escape.
I only wear socks with my motorcycle or combat boots, otherwise I’d end up with blisters everywhere. Never wear flipflops either, just converse, but I can’t stand to have socks anymore.