It’s almost 2 am, and I’m sitting here eating crackers and drinking water.
I want to update you on my Valentine’s Day, because it didn’t go quite like I expected. Somehow I ended up on the floor of Lisa’s bathroom for several hours.
Sober Ashley showed up a little late, grabbed some wine and joined in the conversation. Tipsy Ashley ate some dinner and said several things that Sober Ashley would never say. Then Tipsy Ashley had one too many glasses of wine and transformed into Drunk Ashley. Drunk Ashley rested on the ground for a while until she was in the bathroom throwing up. She spent the next hour or two on the bathroom floor, recovering.
I feel the need to share this with you, because, well, it’s a first for me. I’ve never been that drunk before, and I hope to never be again, because it was miserable. Also, I don’t get to tell stories like this ever.
Other than my time spent on the bathroom floor, I actually had a good time. And, for the record, none of this had anything to do with being depressed on Valentine’s Day. It could have been any day.
As I was leaving, I said to Lisa: “Don’t think less of me.” I was just joking, but later I was thinking about how much I’ve changed. I am a goody goody. Long ago I had reasons for being so, many of them religious. When I realized most of that legalistic stuff was just crap, I gave up the silly rules. But, the stigmas weren’t so quick to fall away. I didn’t start drinking until I was 22, and even then, I hated buying alcohol for myself. It felt shameful somehow.
Maybe this sounds stupid, but spending hours drunk on a bathroom floor and feeling no shame for it–not even worrying that someone might think less of me–felt liberating. I gave up the rules, and the stigmas and judgment followed.
That said, I’m never drinking again.
{ 20 comments… read them below or add one }
I love the way that you talk about the events as if there were three different people. :p
In my opinion, so long as it’s never somebody’s intention to get that drunk then I don’t think that there’s much stigma with… Sometimes it’s just one drink too much. It’s those that continually subject their body to that sort of treatment that makes me raise my eyebrow and think “Why?”
As the saying goes: “Take everything in moderation… Even moderation”.
I think everyone needs at least one moment like that in their lives. And hey, at least now you know what happens with alcohol! (I had such a moment too several years ago and now I make sure never to drink more than 3 glasses of an alcoholic beverage per evening).
That sounds a lot like my evening. All that matters is that you had fun (minus the time spent in the bathroom.) We all have nights like that sometimes.
Throwing out the rules, liberating yourself is one of the best things you can ever do. Most of us have had a night or two (or three) like that. Hope today isn’t rough for you. =)
So what stuff did you say drunkenly that you wouldn’t normally say??? Can you remember? I’m the Queen of Saying Stuff Drunkenly that I wouldn’t normally say – like “If you’re HIS friend then you must like to shag dead people” springs to mind…
Oh, I’ve been there. I have vowed to “never drink again” a few times. I do, but I usually remember soon after. I too was labeled a “goody two shoes” in school, and it can be fun/annoying as hell when an old classmate comes up to voice his or her shock at seeing me. Cheers to the Goodies!
Two simple pieces of advice, from one used-to-be-a-drinking-novice to you….
1. Never say “never.”
2. Always drink one glass of water per glass of wine.
Hope you get lot’s of rest and feel better!
I had a similar experience when I started drinking. I was dating an extremely religious guy and realized I wanted to know what it was like to be a “normal” college student. Several years later, I realized, while fun, the alcohol put me in some bad situations. Now, I am extremely careful about how much I drink.
Hooray for fun nights. They are okay every once in a while. Hope your head is nice to you this morning. :)
That “I never want to drink again” will pass. I think I’ve said that 3-4 million times. Haha.
I can relate though. I never really drank until way after my 21st birthday. I always felt a little goody goody. Now, I don’t drink everyday like some of my friends, but I get it in.
I’m so happy that you were able to feel no shame as well., Your friends will be there in that same position soon, and you’ll be able to laugh about it with him.
I think it’s perfectly reasonable to get drunk to that extent if you started drinking without the intention of getting wasted – it only becomes an issue when you get *that* drunk for the wrong reasons. (If that makes any sense – I’ve been editing today and can no longer construct articulate sentences it seems! Sorry!)
Hope you’re feeling okay now! :0)
It’s one thing to drink/get drunk, and a whole other to get shitfaced and throwup all the time. I don’t think you have anything to worry about. You had fun, and that’s all that matters.
I think it’s great that you have given up the rules and stigmas. I’m working on giving those things up right now. Good luck with your hangover today.
Best Valentine’s Day party ever!
Aw, well don’t feel too bad or guilty! Stuff like that happens and your friends won’t think less of you. I’m the same way though; I’m big on being in control and I’m always worried what people will think of me in regard to drinking. But, trust me, it’s all right!
I’m glad you weren’t depressed on Valentine’s Day, though I’m sorry it didn’t go as planned. Keep on drinking water, eating crackers and maybe having some Sprite or ginger ale.
It’s great that you felt no shame. Live! Even if living sometimes involves a mop and a toilet. It’s so important to experience all that you can, while you can. No one will ever think less of you, and anyone who does is just jealous that you have your own agenda on your pathway to life!
I don’t handle my alcohol very well and I’ve had a number of nights like that. The hangover the next day is the absolute worst, I think that sometimes you feel so sick that you want to die. I’ve also said ‘I’m never drinking again’ many times, somehow I always find myself back on that bathroom floor….
Ugh, I didn’t drink last night, but I was throwing up sick all night, so I definitely know how you feel.
Don’t feel shameful about drinking, sometimes it’s fun to let loose!
Nope, I understand that.
Never drinking at ALL ever again?
I know how THAT feels. The worst is after the throwing up happened it’s the room spinning that doesn’t stop. It’s horrible.
haha! I have also been “Drunk Ashley” before…ohhhhh, bad times. But funny as well.
So from one drunk ashley to the next…we’ve all been there!